Skies I Once Knew
by NYC.Lovers
Summary: 'Get me with those grey eyes.'   When he told John that he did not have friends and he only had one, Sherlock lied a little bit. He had another friend, once. And she was his only regret in life until now. Sherlock/OC. Inspired by a song.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Skies I once knew.

**Author:** NYC Lovers

**Category:** Original

**Disclaimer:** Sherlock (BBC Series)

**Genres:** Romance, Hurt/Comfort.

**Rating:** T

**Pairing:** Sherlock/OC

**Status:**_** Completed.**_ (Don't worry, it's short, I swear!)

**Warning:** OOC.

**A/N:**

'_Get me with those green eyes, baby, as the lights go down_

_Give me something that'll haunt me when you're not around.'_

I was inspired by Taylor Swift's line from her song "Sparks fly", she is the best lyricist I have ever seen, do you know that? (ha-ha). And it reminded me of Benedict's eyes from the movie. They were grey-ish, right? (Sorry, I never paid attention to such things of him since I was focused on watching the plot, hearing the powerful words of Steven and Mark and enjoying their acting skills more than their appearances). So I changed the lyrics a little bit, just _green_ to _grey_. Even though the lyrics and the song are all happy but I always look at it the other way round so the story is not fluff, and it sounds sad :"( So basically, his eyes play an important part in the story. Hope you like it.

**Please R&R.**

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><p><strong>01.<strong>

When he told John that he did not have friends and he only had one, Sherlock lied a little bit. He had another friend. At least to himself he had another friend, once.

Felicia Wilson was a nice college friend.

And she was his only regret in life until now.

Sherlock was amazed by her persistence and patience. No matter how annoying he was, she put up with him every single time he acted mean to her. He did not pay attention to her at first. She was just an average student in his class. They coincidentally shared the same timetable in the autumn semester. It was unbelievably cold at the time, colder than ever. And Sherlock always saw a brunette sitting beside the window during class. Her dreamy eyes were staring blankly at the grey sky outside. As the lesson carried on, her mind was not there with it. He took four courses that semester and he saw her in all lectures and tutorials he attended. Some students called her freak since she did not care about what was actually going on in the campus and if she talked, she freaked them all out.

She always sat on her right. And he always sat on his left. So basically they never talked, their eyes never met and they were running in different universes.

And they would never talked if the school did not change the classroom the other day. It was a Monday and the weather was terribly cold. Sherlock got to class early. Noticing there was only one window in the room, he went and sat there, even though it was on his right. At the time he never cared about her habit. The consulting detective-to-be was reading his book, and it was not the prescribed textbook, when a hand touched his shoulder. Sherlock looked up to see the tall slim brunette was standing next to him.

'Can you, please, let me sit here?' She spoke softly.

'Why?' He asked annoyingly. He was another freak in the faculty at the time. Sherlock never thought someone would speak to him and definitely no one would care to take away his seat.

'Because it's on the right. And I usually sit on the right. And I like sitting next to the window.' She smiled politely.

'It's my hobby, in case you must know, sitting next to the window. And I got here first, not like someone running late because she had breakfast late, probably because of the party she attended last night and she couldn't get a hold of herself, which a hundred percent leads to a hangover the very next day, which is Monday, today. So basically I don't see any good reason for me to give my seat to you.' He ended in the most annoying manner he could be.

'Just... a 'no' is fine.' She looked at him with narrowed eyes and a big frown. Then she left for the table behind him. Sherlock knew she wanted to say something because he saw a spark of fire in her eyes, but for some reason, she held it back.

He found out that he could no longer focus on his autopsy book. Sherlock turned around to have another look at the brunette behind him. She was staring at the sky with the most illusional eyes he had ever seen. But when he laid his eyes on her, she noticed. She gently glanced at him and smiled. Sherlock frowned when she smiled. The moment ago she showed clear sign of anger, now all her anger had disappeared.

'Looking at the sky is funnier than reading the autopsy book of yours.'

'I beg your pardon?' Sherlock asked surprisingly.

'What? I just say the truth. I agree that the text book is stupid but I don't think autopsy is better.'

'There's nothing up there!' He protested. For the very first time, there was someone had enough dare to _insult_ his book. Sherlock always believed that he had perfect taste in books, especially _real smart_ books.

'Everything is up there. Want to see?' She said and stood up to sit next to him. The table was small so she literally leaned over him. She pointed at the sky, at the clouds.

'See, those are the ears, and those over there is the tail.' She said with sparkling eyes.

'Oh, God. So what? A rabbit?' Sherlock broke his patience. 'I'm sorry, how old are you?'

'Well, it's a metaphorical saying. I see life over there. I think life is better over there.' She said softly. There was a slight sign of sadness in her eyes. But then she cleverly hid it away that he almost thought it was a mistake. It made him think that there was something wrong with his previous deduction. 'I'm Felicia, by the way.' She crossed her arms on his table and smiled.

'Sherlock Holmes.' He replied shortly. Normally he did not want to talk with boring strangers, especially woman, but there was an uncanny feeling in his stomach that made him want to talk to her more.

'Oh, the freak, just like me.' Felicia smiled widely.

Sherlock just frowned and stared at her strangely. Felicia was nothing but a normal student, as he started to recall from the previous classes, yet people called her just like him. It was not easy to make people call you a freak, he could not find any reason she was labeled that name.

'So today you have the sky, I have your autopsy book instead.' Felicia softly said and took the book away from him. She returned to her seat behind him and started to read the book. Sherlock was left with nothing interesting but the _sky_. He sighed annoyingly but he did not object nor did he take the book back.

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><p>Felicia Wilson was a strange girl after all. After classed, he turned around to see her but she had gone with his autopsy book. Only a small note was left for him to tell him if he wanted his book back, then he shall meet her at the place he can watch the stars. The young man frowned at her note. As he remembered, they shared the same timetable but for the rest of the day, she did not attend any class. He could always get another book he liked but today, he stared at the sky as she told him, wondering what was up there that made her fell for it. But he found <em>nothing<em> but a horse, a skull, and bunches of things he saw from the clouds.

Sherlock did not go home that day. He stayed at the library till midnight, finding anything fun to do besides doing the boring and obvious homework he was given. And he also wanted to find the place where she watched the stars. He reasoned that she kept one of his rare autopsy books, so he had to take it back. The window was left open. The sky was amazingly clear that night. All the lights had gone out, except in the library and another room he found there was no reason for the lights to be left on. Sherlock quickly glanced at the campus map.

Astronomy room.

Sherlock stood up and rushed to that room.

Felicia was there, looking into the telescope and humming a song. As he came closer, he saw that she was wearing headphones. There was piles of CDs lying around her, indicated that the mp3 player was turned on all the time and she spent most of her days here, looking at the sky. Sherlock slowly approached her. She turned around as he put his hand on her shoulder. As soon as she realised that was him, she smiled and put her headphone off. The brunette quickly cleaned up the CDs to give him some space to sit and she gave him a blanket when he sat down next to her.

'Tea? Coffee? Please have tea because I can't find coffee anywhere in this bloody room.' Felicia smiled again.

'Tea, please.' Sherlock replied and glanced at her with questioned eyes. 'No sugar.'

'Have one or two. It's nice having tea or coffee with two sugars. It's not healthy anyway but it improves the taste.' She said and put two sugars in his cup of tea, without waiting for him to reply.

She was too demanding! After giving him the hot cup of tea he did not really like, she gave him his book with a soft thank you that he almost thought that it was his own imagination. For the first time of the night, he realised that she did not wrap herself warm enough. She just wore a pair of black jeans, a thin white shirt and a red coat which could definitely not protect her from the cold. He could see her fingers and her cheeks were red. She was cold.

'You should wrap yourself up a little bit more.' He said.

Felicia turned around to see him with the shiniest golden eyes he had ever seen. She put her chin on her knees and wrapped her arms around her legs. Her brown flocks of hair fell down naturally. She rolled her eyes and gently bit her lips, thinking and considering the answer.

'Is it cold, up there?' She finally asked.

'Yes, it's in the book.' He nodded.

'Then I guess I should learn to get used to the cold.' She smiled and turned to look at the sky again.

'Why? You can't go there.' Sherlock replied frankly.

'I just feel like it.' She shrugged and gave him her wide smile with her shoulder gently shrugged. 'How's the tea going?'

'It's… fine.' It was not exactly a lie. He did not like it, but he did not hate it. Sherlock turned to look at the sky with her, wondering about her words. She avoided the topic, twice.

'Good, very good.' She nodded. 'It's very nice talking to you, Sherlock.' She called his first name for the very first time. 'So, why do you ended up here, studying finance and law when your interest is somewhere else?'

'Why do you ended up here, studying finance and law when your interest is over there?' He asked back, rolling his eyes to the sky. Instead of replying to his question, Felicia just laughed. And he joined her, as if it was the most natural thing in this world. It had been a very long time since he last laughed that carefree, and unreason.

'It's getting late.' She looked at the clock. 'I'd better get home.'

'Oh, yes. We should.' Sherlock stood up and gave the blanket back to her.

'Just leave it there. No one really uses this room. I'll be here tomorrow.' She smiled when she grabbed her bag and walked out of the room.

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><p>Sherlock ended up walking Felicia home. She lived near campus and her house was actually closed to his shared flat with some college friends. The weather was getting colder, yet she did not put anything else to keep warm but her coat. Sherlock had to give her his coat but she refused and they ended up in a <em>chase<em> when he tried to put the coat on her and Felicia just ran away. It was the very first time in his life he cared about someone. He just met her but there was something about her that he could not read or deduct. She kept herself not too close to him, but not too far. The brunette was friendly, and also secretive. He told himself that he wanted to know the truth about her sky. That was why he talked to her.

'Hey, Sherlock.' She called him when he turned his back away, preparing to come home after taking her to the doorstep. Sherlock did not say anything. It felt like magic when she called him like that. He just turned back and looked at her, waiting for her to say something. 'Your deduction this morning, was not exactly right, just so you know.' It was almost a whispered. And she disappeared behind the doors before he could say anything.

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><p>Sherlock Holmes was lying in his bed, thinking annoyingly about the last words of Felicia. How could he be wrong? There was nothing wrong with his deduction. He was <em>always<em> right. Suddenly the autopsy book fell out of his bag and dropped on the floor. He sat up to saw a paper fell out from the book. It was Felicia's. She thanked him for lending her the book and she was sorry for saying that autopsy was boring. He gently smiled at her elegant handwriting.

But he was still annoyed by her words. 'Wrong' was not acceptable. He needed the truth. His brain could not rest until he find out about everything. But he also started to wonder was it only his brain wanted to know about her or was there something extra? Every time she smiled, he could felt something strange. She was holding something back. And why would she have to be so obsess about the sky?

Why did she want to get _there_?

Sherlock sat up completely. His mind was turned on.

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><p>No matter how hard he tried, he could never figured out what Felicia was hiding. It had become his habit to join her in the astronomy room after classes almost everyday. After that, he came home with his packed-with-questions mind. Sherlock never could know what were her real thoughts. With her, his firm statements all turned into guess statements. But he enjoyed sitting there with her, chatting about all the <em>boring<em> things in this world. He was _kind of_ liking the way she laughed and commented about his carelessness and his particularly ignorance in some topics of life.

And she was absolutely stunning with perfect style of dressing, even though later he had to give her his coat since she never wore more than two layers. Felicia was always cold. She resisted at first but then she did not do anything but sitting quietly for him to put the coat on. She was the very first thing in this life that was more interesting than crimes and dead bodies. And she was the very first woman in his whole life. As days past, he accepted the fact that he lost his senses when he was with her because she always asked and showed him things he never knew.

And it did not last for very long.

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><p><strong>So what do you think? This is a two-chapter story so there is only one left. <strong>

**Another Child of mine (lol) be nice to little Felicia (lmao)**

**This story is sad :"( I couldn't help it :")**

**Please R&R.**

**xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**02.**

'You must not hang around with Felicia Wilson, Sherlock.' Mycroft Holmes, his older brother came to his flat on day and said that. Even though he was quite young, but the older Holmes had obtained a minor position in the British government and the family was sure that after a few years, he could become the government.

'It's not your business, Mycroft.' Sherlock was lying in his bed, reading his book and completely ignoring the tall figure standing in the middle of his messy room.

'It _is_ now. I never care about such average girl like her…'

'Felicia is _not_ an average girl!' Sherlock snarled back angrily. To him, she was _perfect_ and he would not change a thing belonged to her.

'As I said,' Mycroft lowered his voice, 'I wouldn't care about her if her parents didn't phone Mummy. And you upset her a lot this time, Sherlock.' He ended with a glare at his younger brother.

'I did not do anything that upsets her!' The younger Holmes snapped back. But the fact her parents contacted his mother concerned him terribly. He stood up and grabbed his coat. He had to see her to see what happened at her place. It was his mistake not asking about her family since he did not want to share his. But he should have asked her.

'Where are you going?' Mycroft asked.

'Out.'

Sherlock dashed out of the flat and ran as fast as possible to her place.

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><p>Felicia was shouting inside the house when Sherlock arrived at her doorstep. He planned to press the doorbell but her voice stopped him. She was crying and her parents' voices sounded angrily. Then he heard angry footsteps towards the door. And then Felicia's voice rose:<p>

'Don't stop me. It's _my_ life and I am going to live it the way I want.' She sobbed and opened the door.

It was when she saw Sherlock standing in front of her with his beautiful grey eyes that were full of confusion. Felicia quickly wiped out her tears and smiled weakly at him. She slammed the door behind her as she approached him. What was he doing here? How much did he hear? She never wanted him to see her cried like this. She wanted him to keep her cheerful and energetic image in his mind.

'It's all right.' Felicia said and grabbed his arms. He felt like he had been dragged away with the surprising force that could never come from her.

Sherlock did not say anything until her house was completely out of sight. She was not all right. The way her hand held on to his arms was not at all all right. Felicia never acted like that towards anyone. He knew he had to stop walking. It was now or never. He had to ask her what was going on. He had to _know_. He _wanted_ to.

So he stopped.

'Felicia!' Sherlock called her by her name. It was not like he never called her like that but this time he sounded more demanding.

'Let's find a place to talk.' She whispered softly. 'How about yours?'

'That's okay. I guess my brother had already left.' Sherlock nodded.

Felicia smiled as she continued to hold on to his arm and walk to his flat.

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><p>It only took them twenty minutes to get to his flat. During their walk, Felicia hardly spoke. Every time he looked down to see her, she just avoided his eyes. She never did that before. The reason why he enjoyed talking with her was her honesty and she never looked elsewhere but his eyes when she told him something important. And now Sherlock was dying to see those beautiful golden eyes again and she just hid them away from him.<p>

It was a weekday, as he recalled, so all the people in the flat were there. When they came home with her hands tangled with his arm, everyone stared at them in shock. They never saw Sherlock with a woman, and now he was with one. She was stunning and definitely beyond a freak's reach. Then they realised that girl was Felicia Wilson, the other freak. Horrified looks appeared. And Sherlock was not sure if they were scared or not when he opened the door of his room and they walked in. He never had time to observed them since the only one that concerned him was Felicia.

'Sorry, it's not that tidy.' Sherlock said quietly.

She shook her head and gave him a gently smile. Sherlock quickly put away all the books on his bed to give her some space to sit. She softly chuckled to see his clumsy action. Who knew Sherlock Holmes, the annoyance, could be this _awkward_. Felicia could not help but thinking it was her fault. She should never have let him see her cry. Sherlock turned on the heater and wrapped a blanket around her body. Then he left the room to get her some drink.

'Here.' He gave her a hot cup of chocolate. 'It'll warm you up.' Then he came to sit next to her on his bed. She nodded and took the cup from him.

'Thank you.' She said.

After that was the longest silent moment in his life. Both of them did not open their mouth to talk. It was just like the time they sat in the astronomy room for hours and stared at the sky, but this time there was no sky. Sometimes he secretly turned to see her and caught her staring blankly at the space before her eyes. There was the saddest smile he saw on her face. She looked pale and tired than ever. What had happened to her? Sherlock knew she was not physically strong but she always carried sunshine with her. Her sunshine lightened up his sky. And now it had gone.

'I'm sorry.' She suddenly said. Felicia put the cup on the small table beside the bed and turned to see him. 'I shouldn't let my parents call your mother.'

'Why did they call her?' Sherlock asked.

'Because they think you're a bad influence in my life. It's ridiculous! How can a guy with unbelievable knowledge about the world be a bad influence?' She raised her voice.

'Am I?' He asked, demandingly.

'No!' She snapped back.

'What is wrong? Don't you dare ignore me this time, Felicia!' Sherlock grabbed her shoulders and faced her.

Felicia frowned lightly. Then she moved closer to him. Her hands made its way to find his. It was cold, as usual. Sherlock held her hand tightly. His breath became faster as he felt the sparks fly when she touched him. He knew he should not felt like this but when he realised that, it was too late for him to do anything. To Sherlock, Felicia was _special_. And there were chances that he could name the indescribable feelings in his heart. She found his heart.

London suddenly became warmer when she was in his arms. Sherlock did not have an explanation for this action because he followed his thoughts and they told him to do so. Her shoulders were shaking. She was crying, he was sure. He could also feel her arms wrapped around his body. It was the first time he knew she was so slim and fragile. And for the first time, his everything was right there, in his arms, more important than anything else. The time had stopped and the earth stood still. Completely zero gravity, he was captured in her world.

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><p>They could not remember how many hours had passed. Felicia was lying in his arms for so long that all of her senses started to melt away. Sherlock looked at her face. Her eyes were closed tightly. Her lips looked pale and her skin was whiter than ever. She was just like a small snowflake and everything could take her away from him in no time. She was leaning on his chest. And it was okay if he stayed like this forever.<p>

'Hey, are you awake?' Felicia suddenly spoke.

'Yes, I am.' Sherlock replied. He coughed as she moved up a little bit to face him. They were sharing his pillow now.

'You remembered the time I told you your deductions were not exactly right?' She said and she giggled as he frowned annoyingly. The frown confirmed everything. And it seemed like he was still annoyed. 'It's true I woke up late, I attended some kind of spoiled party the day before but I did get a hold of myself and I definitely did not have a hangover. My little sister, Fiona, did. I came to watch her.'

'But the alcohol smell?' He protested.

'Fiona poured it on me. She never acted like that before. So I stayed with her to make sure she got to school on time the next day.' She said.

'Why didn't you say it back then?' He asked.

'Because I thought…' She looked away. 'I thought we could never be this close. It's fine if you just ignore me, like everyone did. But you turned back to see me. Your eyes changed my whole world.'

'Is… that… so?' Sherlock blushed. Felicia laughed when she saw him blushing that serious.

'Yes. So I won't let anyone take what's in front of me away… as long as… I'm still _here_.' She said.

'What do you mean?' Sherlock sat up a little bit. His elbow was used as leverage for him to look at her from above. She turned to look at him in the eyes.

'I'm a selfish person. I shouldn't have talked to you. I shouldn't have made you change like this.' She smiled sadly. 'But I want to. Just take it as a simple deduction. Why do you think I'm obsessed about the sky?'

Sherlock widened his eyes. He stared at her surprisingly. The sky. Her obsession. Her lips. Her cold. Felicia was his _everything_.

'No. You're lying.' Sherlock said horrifyingly. For the first time of his life, he was scared. '_You're lying_, Felicia!' He just lied to himself like that.

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><p>They were fighting very hard. Sherlock's shouting was echoing around the flat. Felicia also yelled at him angrily. They were not mad at each other, and none of them were to blame. The fate had its own fault and they just blamed on it through the other.<p>

'You should have told me!' Sherlock shouted angrily. He wished he had known. Even though he could not do anything about it but he wanted to know.

'So what? It's not like you and I can change anything! Besides I don't want you look at me with pity eyes!'

'What? I don't mean that. I just simply want to _know_!' He snarled back angrily.

'So _what_?' She screamed back.

'So I could _love_ you more properly!' He yelled. By the time he finished his sentence, he realised that he had confessed his feelings to her. She looked at him with her eyes wide opened. Then right after that a tear appeared at the corner of her eye.

'That's why.' She sobbed, letting herself fall into his bed once again.

'You and I are both selfish, I guess.' He came to sit next to her.

Sherlock gently wiped her tears away. She just looked at him with those golden eyes that took all his words away. Sherlock moved closer to her for a kiss. For the whole time, he felt like he missed something, and now he finally found it. Felicia did not resist it. She responded to his kiss with the same passion. The young Sherlock Holmes felt like he already had enough, even though the cruel world out there was ready to take it all away from him in any second.

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><p>They did not met for several days. Sherlock came to her house to see her but her sister told him that she was away with her parents. He could not get into the house so there was no way he could make any deduction about where they had gone. There was no sight of her anywhere in the campus. He could not get in touch with her, either. The young detective knew that it was useless asking his brother or his mother, so he stayed away from them, too. Felicia had disappeared in thin air. And for the first time, he felt helpless towards something.<p>

But he never gave up. He always came to her house in the evening to ask where she was. But the only person answered the door was Fiona. He never met her parents. The sister was not a good help. She was helpless just like him. She was devastated when she knew she would lose Felicia within a few months. That was kind of explained her spoiled actions. Sherlock was the same, he lost her within hours of the very day he found out about her obsession with the sky. At least they had something that connected them. They both loved Felicia.

There was one time he came, the little sister was waiting for him at the veranda. She just shook her head and said she was sorry because she could not give him the answer. Her parents did not tell her anything either. She was worried. Her face looked pale. She resembled Felicia a lot, so Sherlock never stayed too long. He was afraid that his mind would drive him crazy.

'Take very care of yourself. Felicia is worried about you.' Sherlock once told her, when he turned away.

'I will.' She whispered. Her voice sounded like she was crying.

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><p>One day, he came and saw both her parents were at home. Her father opened the door for him. As soon as he saw who was at his door, he furiously closed it. Even though it was only second but he could see her mother was holding her little sister in the arms. Even the man's eyes were red. He could not knock anymore. The young detective-to-be slowly turned away from her house and walked away.<p>

Sherlock Holmes remembered he had spent the whole night in the astronomy room, looking through the microscope they once shared, hoping hopelessly he could find out how she was _up there_.

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><p>He came to her house again, this time with a bunch of white lilies. He pressed the doorbell. When her father came, he stopped the man from slamming the door in front of him:<p>

'I want to visit her. Just once.' Sherlock held his hand on the door and looked at the man's eyes. 'Please.' It was the first time he begged.

'Just let him, Dad!' Her little sister appeared. She gave him a letter with Felicia's handwriting on it. It was addressed to him.

'Fiona Wilson!' The man yelled at his daughter.

'Sis _was_ happy!' The young girl shouted.

'Thank you.' Sherlock replied after Fiona told him the place.

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><p>Her letter was not that long. But he never remembered reading it properly.<p>

All that he knew was her name was engraved carefully and her grave was lying calmly in the cemetery.

All that he knew was the white flowers could not ease his pain of losing her forever.

All that he knew was he never loved her enough, he never told her he loved her enough.

All that he knew was the coldness of her hands that haunted him now and then.

All that he knew was her smile that saved him a hundred thousand times, was her brown hair that playfully danced in the air, was her beautiful golden eyes that he wanted to kept for himself forever.

All that he knew was the grey-ish sky that she adored, was the life that she imagined.

All that he knew was she told him in the letter that:

'_Your beautiful grey eyes are my skies, Sherlock, not the sky I usually see from the window._'

**Felicia Wilson**

**1982 – 2002**

**beloved daughter and sister**

_died of cancer_

**.End.**

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><p><strong>Sorry guys for the delay (sob). I've just got back to Sydney and uni doesn't give my much free time, not to mention my Internet it's dead. I was furious and sent them strings of emails of complaining when I'm at uni =)) Sorry, can't help (lol). Well, it' my mumbling part :)) Sorry<strong>

**Well, it's the end ^^ If you enjoy it, please please please Review ^^" I also write a couple of stories about Sherlock/OC if you want to read, check out my profile. Thanks (Hug)**

**It's a sad fic :[ I don't know why I let it end like this but it feels right. I'm weird, I know =))**


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